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Post by nottslynne on Dec 18, 2006 11:20:05 GMT
The Silent Treatment:
>A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving
>each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the
>next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early
>morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the
>silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at
>5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she would find it. The next morning,
>the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his
>flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened
>him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It
>is 5:00 AM. Wake up." Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
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Post by nottslynne on Dec 18, 2006 11:20:30 GMT
WIFE VS HUSBAND
>A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
>An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted
>to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats,
>and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?" "Yep,"
>the wife replied, "in-laws.
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Post by nottslynne on Dec 18, 2006 11:20:48 GMT
WOMEN'S REVENGE
>"Cash, cheque or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished
>to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control
>for a television set in her purse. "So, do you always carry your TV
>remote?" I asked. "No," she replied, " but my husband refused to come
>shopping with me, and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do
>to him legally."
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Post by nottslynne on Dec 18, 2006 11:21:05 GMT
UNDERSTANDING WOMEN A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE) I know I'm not going to
>understand women. I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot
>wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and
>still be afraid of a spider.
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Post by nottslynne on Dec 18, 2006 11:21:25 GMT
WORDS
>A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a
>day...30,000 to a man's 15,000. The wife replied, "The reason has to
>be because we have to repeat everything to men... The husband then
>turned to his wife and asked, "What?"
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Post by nottslynne on Dec 18, 2006 11:21:45 GMT
CREATION
>A man said t o his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid
>and so beautiful all at the same time. "The wife responded," Allow me
>to explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; God
>made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!
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Post by nottslynne on Dec 18, 2006 11:22:01 GMT
WHO DOES WHAT
>A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the
>coffee each morning. The wife said, "You should do it, because you get
>up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."
>The husband said, " You are in charge of cooking around here and you
>should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."
>Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible
>that the man should do the coffee." Husband replies, "I can't believe
>that, show me." So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament
>and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed
>says.........."HEBREWS" God may have created man before woman but
>there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.
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