Post by MG on Dec 19, 2006 14:19:48 GMT
Dictionary for women's personal ads..........
40ish - 49
Adventurous - Slept with everyone
Athletic - No Tits
Average looking - Ugly
Beautiful - Pathological liar
Contagious smile - Does a lot of Pills
Emotionally secure - On medication
Feminist - Fat
Free spirit - Junkie
Fun - Annoying
New age - Body hair in the wrong places
Old fashioned - NO BJs
Open minded - Desperate
Outgoing - loud and embarrassing
Passionate - Sloppy drunk
Voluptuous - VERY fat
Large frame - Hugely fat
Wants Soul mate - Stalker
Womens English........
Yes = No
No = Yes
Maybe = No
We need = I want
Sure! Go ahead = You better not
Do what you want = You will pay for this later.
I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you Moron!
You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?
Mens English...........
I am Hungry = I am hungry
I am sleepy = I am sleepy
Nice Dress! = Nice Cleavage!
I love you = Let's have sex NOW
I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you
Can I call you? = I'd like to have sex with you
Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you
I dont think those shoes go with that outfit = I am Gay
A recent scientific study found that women find different male faces attractive depending on where they are on the menstrual cycle.
For example:- When a woman is ovulating she prefers a man with rugged, masculine features.
And when she is menstruating, she prefers a man doused in petrol and set on fire, with scissors stuck in his eye and a cricket stump shoved up his backside.
40ish - 49
Adventurous - Slept with everyone
Athletic - No Tits
Average looking - Ugly
Beautiful - Pathological liar
Contagious smile - Does a lot of Pills
Emotionally secure - On medication
Feminist - Fat
Free spirit - Junkie
Fun - Annoying
New age - Body hair in the wrong places
Old fashioned - NO BJs
Open minded - Desperate
Outgoing - loud and embarrassing
Passionate - Sloppy drunk
Voluptuous - VERY fat
Large frame - Hugely fat
Wants Soul mate - Stalker
Womens English........
Yes = No
No = Yes
Maybe = No
We need = I want
Sure! Go ahead = You better not
Do what you want = You will pay for this later.
I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you Moron!
You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?
Mens English...........
I am Hungry = I am hungry
I am sleepy = I am sleepy
Nice Dress! = Nice Cleavage!
I love you = Let's have sex NOW
I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you
Can I call you? = I'd like to have sex with you
Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you
I dont think those shoes go with that outfit = I am Gay
A recent scientific study found that women find different male faces attractive depending on where they are on the menstrual cycle.
For example:- When a woman is ovulating she prefers a man with rugged, masculine features.
And when she is menstruating, she prefers a man doused in petrol and set on fire, with scissors stuck in his eye and a cricket stump shoved up his backside.